r/worldnews Jan 22 '22 Silver 2 Helpful 6 [deleted] 2

Russian politicians mock Boris Johnson and threaten nuclear attack on London Russia

https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/russian-politicians-mock-boris-johnson-25975069
34.0k Upvotes

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u/ijnfrt Jan 22 '22

If you guys spoke Russian you'd be surprised what people say on their state TV

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u/Typedinletters Jan 22 '22

What do they say?

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u/DibsOnTheCookie Jan 22 '22 Silver

It’s sort of like this. If you watch it and believe everything you hear, then - to begin with, the Ukraine news are not really the top priority. It’s maybe 3rd-4th spot on the broadcast. It seems like some arcane diplomatic negotiation over “those Ukrainians and NATO are making trouble again”. - you never heard of the Russian military build up on the border - you are though acutely aware of NATO military build up at their borders and tons of weapons they’re sending to Ukraine - you have heard western leaders talk about Russian invasion of Ukraine, but it all sounds like an insane lie they made up. It doesn’t agree with your view of the world at all. - you think Ukrainian government is amassing troops to attack “independent” regions in the east of Ukraine (that have millions of Russian citizens with Russian passports living there, no less. You don’t question any of this) - you’ve seen many interviews with likeable, ordinary people living in those regions who say how they’re afraid of a Ukrainian attack. You haven’t seen a single interview with anyone from the rest of Ukraine, unless it paints them in extremely negative light. - you generally think that the Ukrainian government is not legitimate and is a US puppet, and they’re also all fascists who want to attack Russian people

People often ask, how is Putin justifying the invasion to his own people? The answer is he doesn’t - they don’t think it’s an invasion at all.

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u/Suolojavri Jan 22 '22

There is also one thing I've noticed over the years: if something bad happens or some unpopular decision needs to be made — it's always done by/because of the government or Duma or foreign forces. But if something positive — it's always Putin.

Cult of personality

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u/jonnybravo76 Jan 22 '22

Wonder who that reminds me of. I can't quite put my finger on it.

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u/[deleted] Jan 23 '22

...sounds like a toilet flush to me

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u/Curious_Mind_Body Jan 23 '22

Yeah the word "dump" comes to mind.

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u/ghoulshow Jan 22 '22

Gotta love propoganda. He doesnt need to justify anything that his people dont know about.

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u/Miamiara Jan 22 '22

Famous example with subtitles

https://youtu.be/EkMT_oLempE

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u/couplefunones Jan 22 '22 Silver

You can tell because of graphs!

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u/cutofmyjib Jan 22 '22

I love that part

"You can tell it's true because of the diagrams!"

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u/The_Paradoxigm Jan 22 '22 Masterpiece

78% and 45%

Seems legit

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u/andyd151 Jan 22 '22

Coincidence? I think not!

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u/LostAlienLuggage Jan 22 '22

"On thursday, the American president was seen going to a fund-raiser in Washington DC. Also, Russia is the only country with enough nukes to reduce America to ash. Coincidence? I think not.

In other news, the Playstation 5 arrived in Saint Petersburg stores this weekend. At the same time, Russia is the only country with enough nukes to reduce the United States to a boiling, inhospitable hellscape, followed by nuclear winter. Coincidence? I think not!"

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u/Miamiara Jan 22 '22

You are hired!

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u/reMake000 Jan 22 '22

That was 2 separate questions. “Are you considering Putin as a strong leader?” and “Are you considering Obama as a strong leader?”. While “news” host made it look like the question was “Who is stronger leader? Putin or Obama?” Propaganda 101

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u/TheWrapOfKhan Jan 22 '22

Next slide please.

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u/58king Jan 22 '22

My understanding of this all boils down to a quote my Russian friend gave me from when she met with all her elderly relatives over this New Years. They all were saying how pleased and proud they were of Putin because "America, Britain and Europe are scared of us now". To them, the scarier they seem, the more security they have, and the better things will be for Russians.

So that's what I think the fiery language on their state TV is about. They are doing it for internal PR rather than anything else. The older Russians eat it up.

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u/Miamiara Jan 22 '22

It is very close to the truth, it is very important for them to be scary because scary for them means that they are strong. And any compromise and listening to others is a weakness.

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u/Nutsack_Clapton Jan 22 '22

If you're going to be dumb, you gotta be tough

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u/bigpotholes Jan 22 '22

It should be stated that much of the young Russians do not like their government or Putin. At least the young people that I’ve met.

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u/OhImNevvverSarcastic Jan 22 '22

Ah, they're just like us

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u/Sighma Jan 22 '22

It is nothing in comparison to the hate and bullshit they are spreading now. I think their TV shows need to be translated and shown to the people of the west, so they wouldn't have any illusions about what Russia is.

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u/Miamiara Jan 22 '22

I'm surprised that no one did it yet, it'd be very effective. They lately begin to scare me a little bit, they are so vicious.

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u/[deleted] Jan 22 '22

[deleted]

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u/BruceBanning Jan 22 '22

Let’s make this happen. This could be absolutely huge.

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u/Miamiara Jan 22 '22

You can take them from youtube, I really think that Azarjonok is one of the worst now, he is the main Belarussian propagandist

https://youtu.be/5AxB122VUB0

https://youtu.be/dhkA76LZKyk

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u/LostAlienLuggage Jan 22 '22 edited Jan 22 '22

I enjoy how you can tell how Glenn Beck-esque, batshit crazy this is even without speaking a word of Russian. Giant George Soros head displayed the entire time next to a graphic of a snake devouring its own tail next to a graphic of an octopus butt.

Totally unrelated, but it brings back fond memories of the time that Glenn Beck excitedly unveiled his plans for a perfect patriot town and it was a Communist Gated Commune in every single way, except it used the words free market, freedom & patriot a whole lot.

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u/Miamiara Jan 22 '22

You can turn on Russian subtitles and auto-translate them on Youtube. They are decent and you can understand him quite well.

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u/KonradWayne Jan 22 '22

I feel like it would just make all the Q-anon idiots start worshipping Putin. They don't have a strong track record of seeing through blatant propaganda.

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u/FredFredrickson Jan 23 '22

Start? They already do.

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u/th_22 Jan 22 '22

They're a corrupt, failed state. They're desperate.

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u/weeglos Jan 22 '22

...with lots of nuclear weapons. Bad combo.

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u/ConsultMass Jan 22 '22

Wow, I think I just realized that Russia hit a glitch and got stuck in 1968 and the rest of the world just kept going. If someone has access, can you turn Russia off and on again to see if that works?

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u/DoomOne Jan 22 '22 Silver

We tried that in the early 90s. Did not work properly.

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u/overcatastrophe Jan 22 '22

Just made things weirder

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u/Phuc_Dat_Ho Jan 22 '22

And that video is from 7-8 years ago. The current rhetoric is even more trashy.

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u/wastingvaluelesstime Jan 22 '22

Oddly enough the youtube algorithm tried to send me to tucker carlson after watching that

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u/Savinoff94 Jan 22 '22

Also the main guy on this tv show has a house in Italy near Komo lake, I think it's interesting fact

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u/lenzflare Jan 22 '22

Wow some real small dick energy there

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u/george_cauldron69 Jan 22 '22

Can you hive a link? I speak Russian

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u/Miamiara Jan 22 '22

My favourite about burning Ukrainians on the streets of Kyiv with their constitution

https://youtu.be/3s6Ru1NXrO8

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u/george_cauldron69 Jan 22 '22

Fucking nuts..

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u/Typedinletters Jan 22 '22

Can you tell me a recap of it? Im very interrested in what they say on their news

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u/58king Jan 22 '22 edited Mar 29 '22

I've only been learning Russian for 2 years, so I might have got some of it wrong but here:

Guy 1: There is a chance that Ukraine and Georgia enter NATO...

Guy with glasses: No.

Guy 1: There is.

Guy with glasses: No. Then we would go to war with Ukraine. It's our land. Here. Here is your NATO (rude gesture). Don't even dream about it, freaks.

Guy 1: So that's the gist of the ultimatum?

Guy with glasses: Yes. Because Ukraine, generally speaking... It wrote a constitution and says "We are heading for membership of NATO" (rude gesture again). We will take your constitution from you.

Guy 1: And burn it on the Red Square.

Guy with glasses: No. We will burn it on Khreshchatyk (Kyiv's main street) together with you, on your own flames, like you enjoy it (I dunno what he meant by this).

Guy 1: But then they would simply run from you to NATO

Guy with glasses: No no no. They will all run back to us, believe me. Ukranians - Welcome home!

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u/ImhereforAB Jan 22 '22

I read your comment and watched the video for the rude gesture alone. I know what the guy in glasses say now obviously thanks to your comment but honestly cannot take him seriously.

Edit: forgot to say thank you so thank you!

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u/Deiskos Jan 22 '22 edited Jan 22 '22

We will burn it on Khreshchatyk (Kyiv's main street) together with you, on your own flames, like you enjoy it (I dunno what he meant by this).

You missed the next sentence, "На шинах, на покрышках" - "On tyres" (repeated twice with different word for tyre). All of this is most likely a reference to 2014 Maidan revolution where tyres were used to construct barricades, and some got burned in the process (there were molotov cocktails used to defend from APCs and police in general), or on purpose to create general confusion and smoke.

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u/Miamiara Jan 22 '22

Very good translation. A bit about flames is about the Maidan revolution when tires were burned to obscure the view for snipers.

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u/takes_many_shits Jan 22 '22

The fuck do people expect to happen once their government goes to war and gets "their land"? What does each russian think they personally earn if their country gets more land? Not to mention Russia is already geographically massive.

Meanwhile small nordic countries can still have highest living standards despite their tiny size.

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u/Llama_Shaman Jan 23 '22

Sweden here. Living next to russia is like living next to a crackhouse. I wish they’d move. Or get it together. I don’t care which.

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u/takes_many_shits Jan 23 '22

Im a Swede too. I've heard the ridiculous news that Russia conciders Sweden moving its own troops, to our own island (Gotland), a threat. Fucking crackhouse threat indeed.

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u/m703324 Jan 22 '22

North korea type shit. source: I speak russian and have been watching this shit sometimes. It's scary what they believe because they only watch state owned tv

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u/TieLegitimate2123 Jan 22 '22

Well that's where North Korea learned it from. Stands to reason Russia would be the same.

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u/Miamiara Jan 22 '22

"Radioactive ah! Everything! In radioactive ash!"(c) Russian national TV

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u/aimtowardthesky Jan 22 '22

There's no way the oligarchs would stand for this, they own far too much property in London.

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u/P0L1Z1STENS0HN Jan 22 '22

In the late 1970s, General Sir John Hackett assumed it would probably hit Birmingham: Far enough that London would still be habitable afterwards, near enough for everyone to see what happens if Russia doesn't get what it wants.

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u/rusty_bucket_bay Jan 22 '22 Silver Helpful Wholesome Bravo Grande! Wait What?

Ridiculous no way the Russians would actively try to improve the UK.

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u/welock Jan 22 '22 Silver

This is the most British reply I have ever seen lol

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u/PantsTime Jan 22 '22

"Come friendly bombs and fall on Slough".

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u/HuntedWolf Jan 22 '22

If Slough got bombed, would anyone actually notice?

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u/Junglism32 Jan 23 '22

I feel like Slough would somehow do damage to the bomb instead

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u/Bullsquirt Jan 23 '22

there'd be no more episodes of Road Wars. I swear almost every episode they were chasing neds in corsas round Slough

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u/TheEarlOfCamden Jan 23 '22

It isn’t fit for humans now

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u/MonkeysWedding Jan 22 '22

Just wait until you see what was built on the south bank to replace the slums that the Nazis bombed for us.

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u/PTgenius Jan 22 '22

Was it more slums?

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u/HuntedWolf Jan 22 '22

Yes, but also a nice theatre and some snazzy street food places, walking distance from Waterloo I highly recommend it

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u/Articulated Jan 23 '22

I unironically had a great time in Brum recently. Feels like the city is on the up!

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u/WTF_SilverChair Jan 22 '22

Oooh, Brummy burn!

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u/Hoisttheflagofstars Jan 22 '22

Yes. Yes they would.

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u/OnePrettyFlyWhiteGuy Jan 22 '22

No please don’t :( give me a couple of days to gather all of the good ones and allow us to leave first!! Scary that my hometown would be Russia’s first probable target for a nuclear strike!!

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u/Grzechoooo Jan 22 '22

to see what happens if Russia doesn't get what it wants.

Russia wanted to live there, Birmingham was obstructing the view.

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u/haroldbloodaxe Jan 22 '22

As someone from Birmingham, please Russia do it!

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u/ThaneKyrell Jan 22 '22

The UK has nuclear weapons of it's own. If they hit Birmingham, the British hits St Petersburg. It's not a winning game for anyone involved, lol. Yeah, Russia is larger than the UK, but a few dozen ICBMs in all major Russian cities will destroy Russia all the same. And a few dozen is being generous, since we could add France and the the US nuclear arsenal do the response. All of Russia would turn to dust (alongside the rest of the world, but that's besides the point)

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u/MrMonster911 Jan 22 '22

A generally accepted threshold for wiping out human civilization (not the human race, just returning us to early agrarian societies), is around 300 strategically placed, modern nuclear warheads, which is why that's the arsenal most nuclear nations stop at, US and Russian arsenals just seem excessive to me...

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u/tentimes Jan 22 '22

I think the point of having more nukes than needed to end all life is to have enough to ensure that mad doctrine is still valid after a long conventional war with another major power. Imagine a war between US and Russia that have not yet escalated into nuclear war. How many submarines and missile bases can each side lose until they lose the ability to retaliate against any nuclear strike?

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u/DerWaechter_ Jan 22 '22 edited Jan 23 '22

Also to kind of make a point of:

"It doesn't matter how good your defenses against a nuclear strike are. We have enough to overwhelm any protection you might try"

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u/tentimes Jan 22 '22

Yeah I would think this is a big reason for Russia's number of nukes.

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u/HeirOfHouseReyne Jan 22 '22

An excessive amount of nukes is also "useful" if another global nuclear superpower asks you to give up some nukes as show of "good faith". They could give up something, but if you have more than you'll ever need, you're not really giving up anything. At best they were deconstructing their oldest nuclear missiles to recycle the content into newer, high-tech missiles.

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u/Beardywierdy Jan 22 '22

"Having more nukes than is needed" is the only time you actually have Mutually Assured Destruction. (It's a very misused term, most of the time people use it they mean deterrence)

Lets take the UK as an example. Mutual destruction between Russia and the UK is not "assured" under all circumstances because the UK only has one submarine ready to launch nukes at any one time. If Russia started a war by sinking said submarine, and the second thing they did was nuke the base where the rest of the submarines are before any of them can put to sea there will be no British nuclear response. At all.

Wheras with America both sides have enough nukes that no conceivable attack can get enough of them to stop a massive nuclear response and thus - mutual destruction is assured.

Now, granted the attack on the UK is harder than it sounds, SSBN's (the subs that fire nuclear missiles) are unfathomably sneaky and hard to find, and their location while on patrol is literally the most secret thing there is. This makes step one (sink the sub) very, very hard indeed - but thats not the same as impossible.

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u/[deleted] Jan 22 '22

[deleted]

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u/tentimes Jan 22 '22

Damn I would not like to be president of the US if that ever happened though. Back up your ally and possible end humanity or abandon them? Hard to imagine a first strike against the UK that does not also include first strike against the US.

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u/sharlos Jan 22 '22

Yeah if someone were to nuke the UK, they'd also send nukes at the US in anticipation of the US responding in kind.

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u/NorthOaklandGuy Jan 22 '22

Yeah I seriously doubt anyone would nuke the UK and wait to see what the US does.

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u/StairwayToLemon Jan 23 '22

It's not just the US. France would also send their nukes Russia's way, as members of NATO if nothing else

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u/[deleted] Jan 22 '22

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u/HuntedWolf Jan 22 '22

Personally I think this is the exact reason the Russian spambots and misinformation system has been promoting both Brexit and Trump. Separate and individualise the countries so they aren’t united against attacks. They might not actually be planning an attack but dividing the enemies will always have a benefit.

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u/Mickey_likes_dags Jan 22 '22

The US military nuclear triad is insane. If they were to suffer total destruction of cities/industry they actually have enough subs and failsafe bombers, complete with some shadow government underground, to parking lot someone into the stone age. I'd rather have healthcare tbfh.

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u/tentimes Jan 22 '22

Yeah and the point is to ensure that capability even after multiple years of conventional warfare losses.

The most likely nuclear warfare scenario is probably conventional war that escalates into nuclear, not a first strike out of the blue.

I sure am happy I don't have to pay for your military though, but I wish my country would have followed through on our nuclear weapon program back in the day, would make staying a neutral country much easier.

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u/teems Jan 22 '22

It's not some turn based game.

Once one nuke goes off, everyone's goes off resulting in the end of the world.

Russia attacks 1 UK city, NATO retaliates and turns every major city in Russia into rubble.

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u/TraditionalGap1 Jan 23 '22

Assuming anyone waited for the first nuke to actually go off as opposed to a mass launch when the missile track was detected, it's actually highly unlikely that there would be mass launch in response, since that would ensure a mass counter launch.

Tit for tat, target selection and degrees of escalation have been gamed out for decades now.

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u/-SaC Jan 22 '22

-Does a quick check how far I am from Brum-

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u/00DEADBEEF Jan 22 '22

While that may be true, the reason they won't do this is because the UK has nukes too.

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u/Mixels Jan 22 '22

That and the UK is allied with a wholllllleeee lot of other countries that also have nukes.

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u/chowderbags Jan 22 '22

Well, mostly just the two. But one of those two has plenty of nukes to hit every Russian city a few times over.

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u/Meetchel Jan 22 '22

I’d probably count 3 (US/France/Israel) but honestly zero is enough given MAD also applies to the UK.

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u/slipoops Jan 22 '22

There is also the Nato Nuclear Weapon sharing program that has B61 gravity bombs available to use; but under some form of NATO/US control in Turkey, Holland, Italy, Germany and Belgium (!). Each country has some form of aircraft that can carry them; if the f35 it makes them some degree of first strike weapon.

If it gets really noisy and anyones left there are also a lot of shared nuclear artillery shells in Germany and a few other places in Europe.

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u/wanszai Jan 22 '22

And this is how we finally put the nail in humanities coffin.

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u/Thetford34 Jan 22 '22

A fun bit of trivia, though I'm not sure if it is still current, but during the Cold War, the UK was the only nation with nuclear weapons that didn't require government approval to launch - in theory, any submarine captain with nukes could launch them at his or her own whim. It was even joked that Captain's should assume London was attacked and launch strikes against Moscow if they missed three consecutive days of the BBC's Today proframme (I think in reality, radio wasn't broadcast into the sea anyways).

The reason being that the length of time it would take to authorise a nuclear strike was longer than the period of time given by an early warning system that they were targeted for an attack (approximately 4 minutes) due to the proximity to Russia.

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u/Zanna-K Jan 22 '22

There were similar protocols in the us from what i remember. A number of ICBM's with specific targets were to auto-launch on confirmation of a missile launch from the Soviet Union even without the presidential launch approval. It was part of the MAD principle - even if you somehow managed to disable/kill the president and leaders of Congress and/or disrupt communication between Washington and the missile batteries, missiles would STILL launch and basically guarantee the destruction of the USSR. The idea was that there's supposed to be no possible way to conduct any kind of nuclear strike without also becoming nuked into oblivion yourself.

That's why missile defense is so controversial - if you thought that you could intercept or interdict most of your opponents' ordinance, then you might become more belligerent and aggressive thinking that you have an advantage.

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u/hagy Jan 22 '22

Yep. The game theory and associated foreign policy around MAD leads to some counterintuitive logic. For instance, the USSR vehemently opposed Reagan’s hypothetical and outlandish Strategic Defense Initiative (i.e., Star Wars) program for intercepting ICBMs from space. While the technology was science fiction, the USSR was strongly opposed to any research into that area on the grounds that if successful, the US would no longer fear USSR retaliation and would be more likely to engage in a first strike. It is fascinating how Gorbachev and Reagan both negotiated so vigorously over this hypothetical technology at the 1985 Geneva Summit.

Particularly because the USSR and US already had signed the Anti-Ballistic Missile Treaty in 1972 to address just this hypothetical issue. Gorbachev rightly argued that the US had already agreed to forgo researching such technology on the grounds that potentially invalidating MAD would lead to greater risks than the status quo. Alternatively, Reagan wanted these terms renegotiated and in turn promised to share any results so that both sides would no longer fear nuclear annihilation.

A charitable revisionist view of Reagan’s position is that he recognized Star Wars would never amount to anything useful and instead championed this hypothetical program as a bargaining chip with Gorbachev. The thought being that anti-ICM tech would lead to another expensive arms race, which the USSR could not afford with Gorbachev’s desired economic reforms. Yet nothing in the historical record suggests Reagan had such a strategy. Instead it seems that he was irrationally excited about the possibility of safeguarding the US from ICBMs regardless of how this could actually destabilize the balance of power and increase the risk of nuclear annihilation.

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u/Fabswingers_Admin Jan 22 '22

The UK still doesn’t require government authorisation to launch nuclear weapons.

If the UK is attacked, all deployed nuclear submarine captains open a special safe with a letter from the current Prime Minuster (it’s the first thing they write then they come to power) giving them instructions what to do.

Usually along the lines of, retaliate then find safe harbour with an ally such as the US or Australia and continue the fight.

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u/Ich_bin_der_Geist Jan 22 '22

That's not true. Every new British prime minister writes a letter for the captains. The letter is to open in case of a nuclear war when GB is destroyed.

There are 3 options:

  1. launch the Missiles

  2. Integrate into the forces of a friendly nation

  3. Let the captain decide.

The letter is only to open in case of nuclear war. If a new prime minister is elected the letter is destroyed unopened.

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u/too_much_to_do Jan 22 '22

Then how do we know what's in it?

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u/Ich_bin_der_Geist Jan 23 '22

We don't for the policy that is in place right now. Only the overall possibilities, they are not a secret, submarine commanders are allowed to talk about that and downing street gives out a press release when the new one is written(that's one of the first things a new prime minister had to do).

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u/God_Damnit_Nappa Jan 22 '22

It was even joked that Captain's should assume London was attacked and launch strikes against Moscow if they missed three consecutive days of the BBC's Today proframme

Apparently that's not a joke, it was seriously one of the ways they'd use to determine if London had been destroyed. But it wouldn't lead to an immediate launch, they'd do other checks then open a safe on board that had with instructions from the prime minister

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u/green_flash Jan 22 '22

Also because Zhirinovsky is thankfully just a clown with no real power.

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u/Contain_the_Pain Jan 22 '22

From two weeks ago:

https://m.dw.com/en/five-world-powers-issue-pledge-to-prevent-nuclear-war/a-60317989

Nobody wants one. Nukes these days are to deter invaders and prevent a nation being conquered or destroyed.

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u/00DEADBEEF Jan 22 '22

"Deter aggression" proves my point. The UK has nukes, which deter the Russians from using theirs.

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u/WiseassWolfOfYoitsu Jan 22 '22

Know who used to have nukes? Ukraine. Until the US and Russia guaranteed their sovereignty to give them up. We see how that's going.

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u/Suq_Madiq_Qik Jan 22 '22

As long as they don't target Knightsbridge, all good.

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u/cietalbot Jan 22 '22

But what about their servants?

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u/kent_eh Jan 22 '22

But what about their servants?

When have the ultra-rich ever cared about their servants?

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u/jheins3 Jan 22 '22

I love my constituents! I am their Sovereign!

"PULL"

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u/malignantbacon Jan 22 '22

They own property everywhere. You don't get to be that rich by putting all your eggs in one basket.

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u/EverythingIsSFWForMe Jan 22 '22

While they do have other properties, not all of them have second wives and children stashed in case the ones in London perish in a nuclear strike.

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u/Blackadder_ Jan 22 '22

But they have mistresses elsewhere like Monaco

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u/thewayupisdown Jan 22 '22 edited Jan 22 '22

You'd be surprised how some people got rich in the free-for-all that was post-Perestroika Russia.

Edit: Like say buying a State-owned coal company and you pay by borrowing 1% of the asking price and pay the rest in the form of guarantees for future coal shipments, from the company you will then be the owner of.

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u/BigBradWolf77 Jan 22 '22

the secret ingredient is crime

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u/Akhevan Jan 22 '22

"Crime" doesn't even begin to describe what was happening, our entire nation was raped by a bunch of bastards who now make up its government. Which is not to say that things were stellar before, but the 90s and everything that was transpiring were a new level of low.

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u/pasatroj Jan 22 '22

U Chicago Econs doing their thing.

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u/communist1871 Jan 22 '22

London is the Russian dirty money capital.

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u/notwritingasusual Jan 22 '22

A deranged speech, by a deranged man in a deranged newspaper.

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u/Holyshort Jan 22 '22

Standard Russian TV show for masses they do this about Ukraine for the past 8 years. Boris gets extra points for forcing shit campaing from Russia.

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u/SunnyHappyMe Jan 22 '22

I think you just started watching TV 8 years ago

anti-Ukrainian rhetoric (and action) is one of the main pillars of Kremlin propaganda

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u/TheAngryGoat Jan 22 '22

They wouldn't dare try to attack the UK because they know we'd immediately drop Prince Andrew into their schools.

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u/PinguPingu Jan 22 '22

That and half their wealth is in London properties.

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u/_High_pitch_erik_ Jan 22 '22

Nobody can nuke London because they'd get revenge attacked by the entire coke industry.

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u/Antice Jan 22 '22

I read that as getting sanctioned by drug cartels....

Nuke London? No more drugs for you Putin.

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u/DragoonDM Jan 22 '22

Mutually Assured Diddling?

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u/Phynaes Jan 22 '22

The UK would be committing a pretty serious war crime if they did that, deploying a weapon of mass disgustion. It would be in self-defence, but still.

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u/nomorerainpls Jan 22 '22

That is provably untrue. He was disarmed when the Crown deployed him to Grenada, during which, through heroic actions, he sustained a severe injury that rendered him incapable of perspiring. This proves he cannot dance in clubs with underage girls. Case closed.

/s

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u/7inky Jan 22 '22 Silver Gold All-Seeing Upvote Vibing

I guess my comment will get buried but if a few people read it - it's worth it. This is Zhyrinovskij (not sure if this is how his surname spelt in latin alphabet). He's a joke that's been around for decades, a politician with a clown persona that will say very controversial things just to stir shit up. No one takes him seriously, even in Russia.

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u/yaboiChopin Jan 22 '22 edited Jan 23 '22 All-Seeing Upvote

Yup. This entire thread is gobbling up this article as if this was serious threats. They don’t understand that state TV is full of garbage political shows nobody cares about or watches. Watching everyone here take their statements seriously is the exact reason they have such a terrible misinformed opinions of the Russians. We enjoy watching our politicians make idiots of themselves on TV. Including Zhirinovsky. At this point he's my favorite actor lmao. I still remember his meltdown in Duma and even Putin was making fun of his extremism.

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u/QueenOfQuok Jan 22 '22

When I read about the guy in the Duma threatening a nuclear strike on America I was like "Oh jeez they might actually do it."

But now I read this headline and I wonder if they just throw out nuke threats like candy.

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u/hjadams123 Jan 22 '22

They do. They know there are no winners in nuclear war. Just a bunch of dead ass people on both sides….so what’s the point?

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u/ASK_IF_IM_PENGUIN Jan 22 '22

Also, just remember that just because its some politician saying it, it doesn't mean they speak for all of Russia or that its remotely true.

Just remember the amount of complete and utter bollocks that Trump came out with, and that Louie Gohmert said that he thinks the attempted coup on January 6 was a Democrat conspiracy.

Russia is dangerous and we should oppose their attempted invasion, but it doesn't make this at all likely.

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u/Eat_dy Jan 22 '22

But now I read this headline and I wonder if they just throw out nuke threats like candy.

Kind of like Kim Jong-un for the past decade.

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u/chubbyurma Jan 22 '22

Easily the worst invention to fuck around with

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u/Nineties Jan 22 '22

"fuck around and find out" has never been more dangerous

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u/tomfoolist Jan 22 '22

Would be a great epitaph on humanity's gravestone

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u/MajorasTerribleFate Jan 22 '22

We'll use the last of humanity's resources to scorch a message into the ground at a size readable from space:

"tl;dr: Fucked around, found out."

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u/krell_154 Jan 22 '22

Zhirinovsky publicly asks for a nuclear strike very often

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u/Effehezepe Jan 22 '22

But of course, Zhirinovsky is Zhirinovsky. Is sole job is to make United Russia look reasonable.

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u/SunnyHappyMe Jan 22 '22

during the capture of Crimea, Putin promised nuclear strikes on Ukraine.

these are nuclear terrorists at the head of the territory under official authority with a representation in the UN, etc.

everyone seems to get used to what it is impossible to get used to

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u/graeuk Jan 22 '22

this guy reads like the Russian answer to Alex Jones

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u/george_cauldron69 Jan 22 '22

Zhirinovsky is a subhuman peace of shit. He was always having fist fights with other politicians, he's a clown. You can find lots of videos on YouTube

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u/[deleted] Jan 22 '22 edited Mar 27 '22

[deleted]

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u/melithium Jan 22 '22 All-Seeing Upvote

These guys are almost dead from old age and they want to ruin it for everyone else. Fuck them

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u/BadAtHumaningToo Jan 22 '22

It's almost like these old ass politicians shouldn't be allowed to lead.

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u/ValhallaGo Jan 22 '22

They don’t actually want to do anything. They’re acting tough and posturing, meanwhile they probably own property in London. They wouldn’t actually do anything.

Similarly, Russia likes to use its natural gas exports as a threat, but they can’t cut it off completely without crippling their own economy.

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u/Interesting-Tip5586 Jan 22 '22

Russian parliament 6 years ago. Russian politician LDPR party leader Vladimir Zhirinovsky calling to bomb France and burn Germany. yes he is still free and fine.

They have been saying stuff like this for 8 years now.

.... And This Russian TV shows have called for mass murder and use of nukes many times before.

They spread lies about the west and Ukraine, spreading hate and misinformation.

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u/blewsyboy Jan 22 '22

Tucker Carlsonov...

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u/Khutuck Jan 22 '22

Matt Gaetzovich.

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u/008mantis Jan 22 '22 Silver

*Tucker Carlsonovabitch.

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u/averageredditor_1337 Jan 22 '22

Zhirinovsky says completely deranged stuff all the time. Not worth taking seriously. Literally doing it just for the attention.

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u/TheNathanNS Jan 22 '22

I looked at his wikipedia page and it's insane.

Besides expressing his concern for Turks and Caucasians displacing the Russian population from their settled territory,[24] Zhirinovsky also advocated for all Chinese and Japanese to be deported from the Russian Far East.[25] During his 1992 visit to the United States, Zhirinovsky called on television "for the preservation of the white race" and warned that the white Americans were in danger of turning their country over to black and Hispanic people.[26]

During the 2008 televised presidential debate, he threatened Nikolai Gotsa, the representative of Democratic Party of Russia candidate Andrei Bogdanov with violence, saying he's going to "smash his head" and ordering his bodyguard to "shoot that bastard over there in the corridor"

In a 2003 video,[74] a drunken Zhirinovsky threatened George W. Bush in offensive language. He called the United States a "second-hand goods store" filled with "cocksuckers, handjobbers, and f***ots", and claimed that Russian scientists are able to change the gravitational field of the Earth and sink the entire country.[75] In the video Bill Clinton, Monica Lewinsky and Condoleezza Rice are also mentioned. Zhirinovsky calls Condoleezza Rice: "a black whore who needs a good cock. Send her here, one of our divisions will make her happy in the barracks one night. She will choke on Russian sperm as it will be leaking out of her ears ... until she crawls to the US embassy in Moscow on her knees."[75]

In November 2015, after the incident of a Turkish F-16 fighter jet shooting down a Russian Sukhoi Su-24M jet near the Syria–Turkey border, he stated in a speech to the Duma that Russia must detonate a nuclear bomb on the Bosphorus to create a 10 meters high tsunami wave that would wipe out at least 9 million Istanbul residents.[91]

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u/Nathanisme8 Jan 22 '22

Very cool, empty threats don’t mean much nowadays and right now Russia looks weak.

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u/ArthurBonesly Jan 22 '22

That's kind of the problem. The more Russia barks without actually biting, the weaker Russia looks. If this tension doesn't result in some measurable gain for Russian interest, Russia (and Putin) loses a lot of credibility. There's a very real incentive to eventually flex some muscle if the rest of the developed world keeps calling Putin's bluff.

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u/GolfSierraMike Jan 22 '22

The problem is that flex has been left way too long.

Every day, more weapons, armor, supplies and logistical support flows into Ukraine, which even before then had stated they would fight for every inch of ground to the last drop of blood. This is no Crimea "russian speaking" situation. This is Ukraine, defending thier native soil.

The Russian military is not the cold War power House is once was. Its filled with shit, old tech and under equipped troops. Now facing some of the most sophisticated tech held by people dedicated to no surrender.

They don't win either way.

My money? Putin has been pushed into a corner by a challenger looking to take his position, or install a puppet. Force him into a lose lose in Ukraine and he will not be long for the throne.

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u/Outypoo Jan 22 '22

A man with nothing left to lose is a real issue, if putin ever felt like he's dead or russia is falling id imagine hes unhinged enough to send the nukes out.

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u/TacticalMicrowav3 Jan 22 '22

Russia still acts like the whole mutually assured destruction policy doesn't still exist. They might glass London but Moscow and every other major Russian city probably has at least one nuke aimed at them currently

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u/kent_eh Jan 22 '22

but Moscow and every other major Russian city probably has at least one nuke aimed at them currently

From multiple countries.

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u/BadAtHumaningToo Jan 22 '22

Two or more from some, I'm sure. 🇺🇸

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u/radxliffe1025 Jan 22 '22

Better be with all our taxes going to military!

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u/BrugesMightImpressMe Jan 22 '22

All it takes is for BBC Radio 4 to go off air for a bit and the Royal Navy submarines opens their letters of last resort.

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u/johnny_briggs Jan 22 '22

I read that the other week from some ex sub commander. It sounds absolutely crazy but makes perfect sense. They listen 24/7. He said submariners are actually more clued up about current world events when on a tour (if that's the right terminology) then their surface going colleagues.

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u/TeamToken Jan 22 '22

I guarantee right now theres a nuclear sub somewhere in the arctic circle with a suite of Trident missiles ready to go at moments notice.

Defense and intelligence agencies in US and UK will be in overdrive in the next few weeks trying to get a read on the situation with Ukraine.

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u/mutantredoctopus Jan 22 '22 edited Jan 22 '22

Russian politicians have now threatened both Britain and America with a nuclear attack. Presumably they are able to do this safe in the knowledge that a nuclear retaliation against Russia - would cause billions of dollars worth of improvements.

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u/Pvt_Haggard_610 Jan 22 '22

A full-scale nuclear attack on Russia would cause tens of thousands of dollars worth of damage.

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u/MoeWind420 Jan 22 '22

Best I can do is three dollars.

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u/GravelyInjuredWizard Jan 22 '22

Please, no one forget what a nuclear attack might really be like.

Not now. Not ever. No matter what anyone says or does.

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u/Gedehah Jan 22 '22

Good job on discovering Zhirinkvsky, the most confusing man on earth lol

Some fun quotes from him:

  • "In March next year, I will enter the Kremlin, I will shoot and hang you! Scoundrels and traitors"
  • "Dictatorship is constipation. Democracy is diarrhea. Choose what you like best"
  • "Terrorist attacks are now going on in Europe, and will go all over. And it is beneficial to us. Let them die there"
  • "In our country, all political leaders passed away mainly through death"
  • "I dream of being nothing for a hundred days. To forget everything for a hundred days. Like a bum, throw my jacket over there and lie under the sun"
  • "Friday - Muslims do not work, Saturday - Jews do not work, Sunday - Orthodox Christians do not work, on Monday - revolution"
  • "We will send another 10 million Russians to America and elect our president in America. And you, George, will get a good cell in Butyrka"
  • "Don't force children to learn English. Let them study the Kalashnikov assault rifle better. And then soon the whole world will speak Russian"
  • "Children are not born from relationships between boys. But this is part of erotic culture. "
  • "My hands are clean, but they will be bloody if I become president"
  • "Libya is just a rehearsal. Next in line are Syria, Turkey, Saudi Arabia and, finally, Iran. And in 2030, a blow to China is being prepared"
  • "I like kids. They are stupid, they don't understand anything. They can be fooled ... by anything"
  • "The Communist Party was shit, and this [United Russia] is three times the shit"
  • "There is no gender difference in politics."
  • "I think America should be closed ... "
  • "A woman should sit at home, cry, mend and cook. "
  • "At night, our scientists will slightly change the Earth's gravitational field, and your country [USA] will be under water!"
  • "Britain is the meanest and most insidious thing in world politics. "

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u/Lecastelh Jan 22 '22

"I dream of being nothing for a hundred days. To forget everything for a hundred days. Like a bum, throw my jacket over there and lie under the sun"

The moment you start finding Zhirinkvsky a bit relatable is the right time to close reddit.

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u/Darkone539 Jan 22 '22

Russia is backed so far into a corner they are reminding everyone they have nukes over and over. The UK has nukes too, less? Sure. Enough to make Russia go bye-bye, yeah. They are nukes.

This whole thing is stupid.

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u/Landolph Jan 22 '22

They're truly relying on past successes. I don't understand how such a storied, illustrious country could fall into such horrid shape. They're being held together by tape and glue.

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u/Puzzleheaded-Pen4299 Jan 22 '22

I don’t know shot about geopolitics but I feel like this is the Russia government grasping at straws as they realize their main exports (petroleum and petroleum gas) are gradually becoming irrelevant as the EU is transitioning to renewable energy and becoming less dependent on Russia for energy. Instead of changing with the world they would rather threaten and destroy it.

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u/echoAD Jan 22 '22

Mentioning nukes as some kind of threat means you don't know the first fucking thing about geopolitics, game theory or war.

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u/kent_eh Jan 22 '22

Mentioning nukes as some kind of threat means you don't know the first fucking thing about geopolitics, game theory or war.

Or that you hope the people listening don't...

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u/Onepostwonder95 Jan 22 '22

Nobody that wasn’t suicidal would Launch nukes. Even in complete defeat you as a leader will do a few years in jail and then be released. the second you let of nuke off, your either killed by a nuke in retaliation from a nation that wasn’t even involved because you’re too dangerous to be left alive, or you hang when you are eventually beaten by the whole world for war crimes.

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u/Darkone539 Jan 22 '22

Mentioning nukes as some kind of threat means you don't know the first fucking thing about geopolitics, game theory or war.

It's for the public who, no, probably don't know that much about the "great game".

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u/poloniumTacos Jan 22 '22

Russians poison UK citizens now they want to threaten to Nuke them...Russia really looking like the baddies each day now.

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u/ExploreTrails Jan 22 '22

Putin and his band of miserable fucks sound like Kim Jung-Un more and more everyday.

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u/CosmicLovepats Jan 22 '22

UK: "Finally, an improvement to the london housing market"

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u/MannerIllustrious566 Jan 22 '22

If Putin suddenly dies, this idiot can be elected as the next president. 😓

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u/jesus_you_turn_me_on Jan 22 '22

Which is why I have no hope for Russia and it's future, even if Putin dies its most likely going to be status quo, with mass censorship, Russian propaganda and dictatorship rule.

At best hope, maybe 50 years in the future there will be hope for this country.

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u/Brasco327 Jan 22 '22

Fuck these people and fuck Putin.

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u/capitalismisokiguess Jan 22 '22

They're threatening nukes because it's all Russia has. NATO will fucking wreck Russia in a conventional war and they know it. The louder they are the weaker they are, just like Kim Jong-Un.

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u/Crazy_Reborn Jan 22 '22

Russian "politicians" are just pathetic klowns. It is sad to realise that the contry with this much potential lost all of it because of some mafia ruling the state.

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