r/mildlyinteresting Jan 22 '22 Wholesome 1

I'm leaving diffierent nuts for a squirrel on my balcony, and apparently they dont like hazelnuts

Post image
1.5k Upvotes

320

u/mancroft Jan 22 '22

Try walnuts. Squirrels love walnuts.

270

u/FreedTMG Jan 22 '22

Especially Fat Gus.

117

u/ScrumpetSays Jan 22 '22

Phantastic Gus!!

50

u/FreedTMG Jan 22 '22

I hoped someone would correct me. Did you know that auto feeder he made at the end, eventually Gus chewed through the damn thing. I saw it all on Twitter, it was great.

48

u/Disneyhorse Jan 22 '22

We bought whole-in-shell walnuts for our squirrels and they love them so much they started shredding our screen door for attention. Then they started refusing the peanuts because they were holding out for walnuts. Spoiled critters.

15

u/dac2u Jan 22 '22

That's hilarious, but unfortunate for your screen door

20

u/Zachinabush Jan 22 '22

Came here to say this. Luckily when Mark Rober gets bored, we learn things.

-2

u/[deleted] Jan 22 '22

[deleted]

5

u/senorbozz Jan 23 '22

Timmy we already told you, no Reddit after dinner time.

1

u/DizzySignificance491 Jan 23 '22

Oh, honey, he's still not literate - it's just a Siri transcription. Court therapist says it's triggered by overstimulation from the lady avatars.

147

u/osler4ever Jan 22 '22

Mine will take hazelnuts in the shell. Make sure that any nuts aren’t salted.

48

u/vaizard3 Jan 22 '22

They are all natural. No salts, no nothing.

-7

u/zerowoof Jan 22 '22

Was there any salt on those nuts?

12

u/bremergorst Jan 22 '22

ahem

Which nuts?

19

u/Dankvapedad Jan 22 '22

DEEZ NUTS 🌰

64

u/[deleted] Jan 22 '22

or dry roasted

84

u/55_jumbo Jan 22 '22

Αnd no chloroform

25

u/DeathByRoast19 Jan 22 '22

They don't like the ones with ricin.

19

u/[deleted] Jan 22 '22

They typically don't come back again for arsenic.

28

u/sarcasmo_the_clown Jan 22 '22

Never stop being you, Reddit

6

u/abrasiveteapot Jan 22 '22

Why not roasted ?

134

u/96sheep Jan 22 '22

Squirrels are most likely to take acorns and least likely to take hazelnuts, based on my unscientific home squirrel feeder observation.

47

u/DeathByRoast19 Jan 22 '22

60% of the time they choose acorns every time.

8

u/[deleted] Jan 22 '22

Grey squirrels are notoriously forgetful of where they stash their nut horde. Red squirrels have better memories.

13

u/joelfinkle Jan 22 '22

I've got two American Hazelnut bushes, and on the same day for the last two years (the first years they've fruited), every nut disappears, with a small pile of shell fragments nearby (meaning it's unlikely to be neighbors, likely squirrels). I was planning on putting nets on the trees that day, when my complaint about being robbed of hazelnuts the previous year popped up on my Facebook memories.

Needless to say, I've set a reminder to put up nets a week before that this year.

78

u/Pork_Chap Jan 22 '22

Maybe the squirrels don't know they're hazelnuts and, instead, think they're D's.

31

u/Corvuscoraxea Jan 22 '22

D's nuts? HA! Got theem!

19

u/dirtymoney Jan 22 '22

damn uppity squirrels

Turning their noses up at wonderful hazelnuts.

4

u/oliverkloezoff Jan 22 '22

Yeah, some squirrels are just plain squirrely.

3

u/Mountain_Economist_8 Jan 22 '22

Not my favorite nut either. Now cashews… Forgettaboutit

14

u/myrrhmassiel Jan 22 '22

...maybe it's just the branding; try giving him filberts instead...

64

u/leavethisearth Jan 22 '22

Try adding sugar, palm oil, cocoa solids, and skimmed milk.

-89

u/[deleted] Jan 22 '22

[deleted]

104

u/barquishalafway Jan 22 '22 Wholesome

They were giving the recipe for Nutella you stick in the ass

16

u/SbuaoqhyP Jan 22 '22

I love that you didn’t say they had a stick in their ass, but that they are the stick in an ass. This insult takes a familiar one and just improves it tenfold. Bravo.

10

u/Registered-Nurse Jan 22 '22

Ever heard of Nutella?

20

u/[deleted] Jan 22 '22 edited Apr 15 '22

[deleted]

-9

u/forced_spontaneity Jan 22 '22

Totally, didn’t spot that, I haven’t eaten Nutella in decades..

5

u/earthgirl1983 Jan 22 '22

Aside from the Nutella thing, what makes you think hazelnuts are things they don’t eat? I’m having a hard time picturing a squirrel in the forest passing by a hazelnut shrub without grabbing some nuts.

4

u/coolluck33 Jan 22 '22

They don't like pistachios either

9

u/vaizard3 Jan 22 '22

This one actually took the pistachios tho!

21

u/SomeonePayDelta Jan 22 '22

Sorry it was actually me. Also, can leave out a half lb of almonds next time?

3

u/Great_Boulder Jan 22 '22

I feed the birds, and the sunflower seeds are always the first to be gone. The last type of seed is always these little round orange ones. When they’re the only thing left then the birds will eat them

8

u/GoodboyJohnnyBoy Jan 22 '22

Well I’m not much good at climbing but I would definitely give them a go

8

u/72VirginExpress Jan 22 '22

Those look salted...

10

u/vaizard3 Jan 22 '22

They are not salted. I wouldnt want to kill the guy.

1

u/72VirginExpress Jan 23 '22

That's cool - just an observation - and I like squirrels.

-19

u/[deleted] Jan 22 '22

Hey if I have stale nuts why not have some squirrels eat them? Not like 1 person with 1 jar can destroy an ecosystem.

11

u/LiterallyJustMia Jan 22 '22

No but you could kill a whole bunch of squirrels?

-21

u/[deleted] Jan 22 '22

Bs a few handfuls of nuts isn't going to kill a squirrel. They're not tiny vulnerable babies

12

u/sparklephallus Jan 22 '22

That's literally what they are compared to us.... Just the smallest amount of salt could cause serious permanent damage or death to a squirrel. They are extremely small compared to us so it will take an extremely small amount of salt to kill them. Look it up for yourself.

3

u/Lumbergod Jan 22 '22

My dad had some hazelnut bushes in his yard. It was a constant battle between him and the squirrels for those nuts. Squirrels love hazelnuts.

1

u/AnonFoodie Jan 23 '22

Ty, til Hazlenuts grow on bushes.

2

u/Elegant_Category_684 Jan 22 '22

Hm, that’s pretty interesting.

5

u/Sugar_n_WATER Jan 22 '22

Right? A little more than mild. But not quite damn

2

u/DivydeByZero Jan 22 '22

More for meeeee.

2

u/bizkitmaker13 Jan 22 '22

Those look salty, wash your nuts.

2

u/celesticaxxz Jan 22 '22

They also love tangerines. The local squirrels raid the neighbors tangerine tree and peel them and take them up the tree

2

u/Informal-Habit Jan 22 '22

These are defective squirrels. Get better squirrels. Send hazelnuts to me.

2

u/jtmonkey Jan 22 '22

That’s nuts!

2

u/omdsmr Jan 22 '22

Hazelnuts are notorious for going rancid before other types of nuts. Maybe the squirrels could smell that those went bad. This might also explain why so many people don't like them. Crack one open and see if it is discolored.

2

u/CarneAsadaFriezzz Jan 22 '22

Which balcony? I love hazelnuts

3

u/MaineEarthworm Jan 22 '22

SQUIRRELS IN MY NEIGHBORHOOD LOVE WALNUTS MORE THAN LIFE ITSELF 💯

1

u/CEH246 Jan 22 '22

Says the man with a walnut tree in his yard.

3

u/wampa-stompa Jan 22 '22

Hi, as someone who lives in an apartment building where some other resident on a different floor is leaving out nuts for squirrels: All of your neighbors are now experiencing a squirrel infestation, shit and piss and pieces of nuts all over their balconies. Squirrels don't need to be fed. Stop fucking doing this.

7

u/sparklephallus Jan 22 '22

Believe it or not, some people rent houses or even own houses with balconies and don't share a building buddy.

-5

u/ADacome24 Jan 22 '22

yea and then their next door neighbors have to deal with this bullshit

1

u/sparklephallus Jan 23 '22

I'm inclined not to care, seeing as we humans basically destroyed their entire natural habitat. I'll cut the squirrels some slack.

0

u/lxm333 Jan 22 '22

Hazelnuts are always last to go lol

0

u/Admin_Untold Jan 22 '22

I scrolled through the comments and nobody delivered the required “deez nuts” joke yet so I’ll go ahead and do it. Deez nuts are bad nuts!

1

u/matticustheone Jan 22 '22

Try chin nuts

1

u/bal020 Jan 22 '22

Uncultured squirrels.

1

u/sandrajumper Jan 22 '22

Please make sure you feed unsalted nuts :)

2

u/vaizard3 Jan 22 '22

They are unsalted :)

1

u/bowmans1993 Jan 22 '22

Idk where you live but hazelnuts are pretty expensive where I live lol. I'd just get some peanuts but you do you.

2

u/vaizard3 Jan 22 '22

Sweden! Dunno, think I paid 25 sek for it (2,5 USD)

0

u/bowmans1993 Jan 22 '22

New York usa, I could buy a kilo of shelled peanuts for like 5-7 dollars. Hazelnuts would be like 20-30$ for a kilo. Although most places sell them by like 200-300 gram tins for like 6-7 dollars.

1

u/[deleted] Jan 22 '22

Ewe I dont blame them. Gross

1

u/Donisia25712 Jan 22 '22

But bears love some hazelnuts, you have bears in your hood?

1

u/tforkner Jan 22 '22

They probably don't like filberts, either.

1

u/OhHello969 Jan 22 '22

good to know!

1

u/series_hybrid Jan 22 '22

I know individuals can have preferences, but the squirrels in my trees like apples and peanuts. They do not like oranges or bananas. I'm sure they would like the recommended "walnuts in a shell", but they are pricey.

1

u/imho99 Jan 22 '22

Your supposed to put them in a chocolate spread first... amateur.

1

u/LunaAndromeda Jan 22 '22

That's funny! My grandparents had a hazelnut tree, and grandma was always cursing the squirrels for stealing the nuts. Tree rats, she called 'em. So maybe it wasn't the squirrels?

1

u/todawhet Jan 22 '22

Our squirrels like walnuts, pecans and cashews. But don't touch peanuts

1

u/waywardSara Jan 23 '22

Clearly not a fan of Nutella, that squirrel

1

u/sittingGiant Jan 23 '22

Hazelnuts are for humans

1

u/b2change Jan 23 '22

I have a bird feeder. The birds weren’t interested, but the squirrels were. I put I on the open porch stoop by my kitchen window and put a shelf by the window. My cats love it. You should have seen the moment when my daughter’s gigantic cat spotted the squirrel at the exact moment the squirrel spotted gigantic cat. The squirrel levitated for a moment and the cats eyes got huge. Now the squirrel turns his back on them and eats because he knows they can’t get him.

1

u/GhenniePooh Jan 23 '22

Picky little beggars.

1

u/Joeyjackhammer Jan 23 '22

Even squirrels don’t like these? I feel vindicated.

-19

u/madisonb44 Jan 22 '22

Nobody likes those confirmed

12

u/mafulazula Jan 22 '22

Hazelnuts are delicious. But sure, nobody likes nutella, ferrero rocher, hazelnut coffee or espresso drinks, etc.

1

u/LeafyySeaDragon Jan 22 '22

I understand its popular...but omg nutella is awful.

1

u/not_falling_down Jan 22 '22

I like all of those things, and still never much liked the plain ones that come in bags of mixed nuts.

0

u/Powerful-Knee3150 Jan 22 '22

They always taste stale to me, even when they are fresh.

2

u/OkDawgRight Jan 22 '22

Then you got bad hazelnuts.

There are different kinds.

Nocciola del Piemonte, for example, are really taste ones that are used in high-end chocolate due to their more distinct and creamy flavour.

Good hazelnuts are significantly more expensive than regular hazelnuts. Not only the species matters, climate and soil make a big difference, too.

https://www.tasteatlas.com/most-popular-hazelnuts-in-the-world

This site lists Giffoni hazelnuts as the most popular.

I recommend trying different hazelnuts and see for yourself.

Also, Hazelnuts make the best cream out of all nuts. Hazelnut cream is the absolute best nut cream (see: Milch Jumbo (German), Kinder Bueno (Italian), Nutella (Italian), etc.)

0

u/Powerful-Knee3150 Jan 22 '22

Thank you for the information. I lived in Oregon, where 99 percent of US hazelnuts are grown.

1

u/Powerful-Knee3150 Jan 22 '22

Lol downvoted because I don’t like the taste

-6

u/outbackthreezus Jan 22 '22

Here's a bowl of hazelnuts with a less than mildly interesting maybe/maybe not true story attached

-1

u/forced_spontaneity Jan 22 '22

Ahhhh… yes, that whooshed me lol…

-1

u/Born_ina_snowbank Jan 22 '22

Lot of good suggestions for my bait pile. Thank you all.

0

u/denisenj Jan 22 '22

Interesting! I’ve been leaving peanuts (in the shells). The squirrels love them and so do Blujays

1

u/series_hybrid Jan 22 '22

If you put out shelled peanuts, and also peanuts with a shell, which are taken first? The ones with shells make a mess of shell fragments under the feeder, so I stopped. I had assumed they would take the peanuts inside a shell and store them in their cave.

1

u/denisenj Jan 22 '22

I just put out the ones in the shell. I might see a little bit of fragments but not too bad

0

u/Gdmf13 Jan 22 '22

Did you toast them?

0

u/OkDawgRight Jan 22 '22

That's incredibly weird. Squirrels LOVE hazelnuts and are considered a hazard by hazelnut farmers.

Uhm... maybe they used pesticides when growing deez nuts?

1

u/vaizard3 Jan 22 '22

No idea, but i made sure to buy a natural nut mix. No salt and not roasted. Hej took everything else and everything was from the same bag.