r/cursedcomments 10d ago

Cursed thought Removed: R8 Keep It Cursed

https://i.redd.it/aa5zbn9gkp181.png
7k Upvotes

u/Flair_Helper 10d ago

Hey there, Brianyeetamole! thanks for posting to /r/cursedcomments!!

Unfortunately, your submission "Cursed thought" has been removed for the following reason(s):


Rule 8: Keep It Cursed - Not Cursed Enough/At All - A cursed comment is any comment that strikes the reader into oblivion. Upon seeing a cursed comment, your first reaction should be among the lines of “What the F*$k did I just read??” while leaving you speechless at the same time. Incomprehension of the comment just read, or the blatant gruesomeness of it should be enough to not only make you feel mystified but also to draw a smile on your face. The comment in your post does not reflect that.


If you have any questions, you can message the mod team through modmail Replies to this removal comment will not be answered. Reposting a removed post without express moderator approval will result in a ban.

293

u/synthetic_synthia 10d ago

And Mark now knows what you've been touching too....

64

u/NostrilRapist 10d ago

He already does

8

u/ArltheCrazy 10d ago

Now you can pretend to be Zuck jerking off. The only difference is now you can wipe your lonely tears with $100 bills…..

573

u/myusernamewastaken91 10d ago

Definitely. I'm gonna pet a digital llama

152

u/HappyAngron 10d ago

I was thinking panda but llama sounds great too

46

u/myusernamewastaken91 10d ago

Llamas look so much fluffier

24

u/SamboTheGr8 10d ago

Nah, you're thinking of alpacas

-78

u/spalaXXXX 10d ago

You're stupid and I think your opinion is absolute doo doo water

Good day sir

30

u/HappyAngron 10d ago

Mom? Is that you?

3

u/Wulfe3127 10d ago

i thought ur username is 'HappyAggron'

1

u/Idiocity_ 10d ago

good point, well said but joe

8

u/Far-Village-2834 10d ago

me who wanted to go to roblox: yeah its big brain time

3

u/Uberzwerg 10d ago

That really whips its ass!

3

u/ChickenBoatMemerTime 10d ago

Carrrrrlllllll

4

u/ThadiusCuntright_III 10d ago

I'm gonna beat off so many digital llamas!

2

u/Piipperi800 10d ago

Better yet, imagine Pokémon coming up with a VR game with this kind of a feature

1

u/deathray5 10d ago

Have you not read the copypasta

2

u/Piipperi800 10d ago

Giving headpats to a fish would be kinda weird, would be cooler to give an eevee or a glaceon headpats

1

u/Alarid 10d ago

while jacking off furiously

82

u/yatzhie04 10d ago

A lot of guys be holding melons and watermelons on Meta

198

u/RogueCyanide 10d ago

Zuke's dick?

108

u/not_rahul 10d ago

His species don't have no dicks.

60

u/chupala69 10d ago

They do, but their dicks are retractable.

27

u/TheCrazyGuysCEO 10d ago

Eel dick

Eel dick

Bottom text

5

u/thucydidestrapmusic 10d ago

and also prehensile

3

u/I_Love_Stiff_Cocks 10d ago

so he's a troll?

3

u/handsomellama28 10d ago

Zucc's an Ork?

4

u/not_rahul 10d ago

Studies are still on this. Too early to tell but he aint human with those lizard ass looking eyes.

3

u/beardbot3030 10d ago

Like a Ken Doll

3

u/JJDude 10d ago

It’s more like Zuck’s looking forward to jerk you off personally.

2

u/billytheid 10d ago

Finger that cloaca!

1

u/Evilmaze 10d ago

They breed by direct skin contact, like Kiff from Futurama.

1

u/synthetic_synthia 10d ago

You'd only need a finger for that

85

u/ocarr737 10d ago

That META is a super dumb name and this shit is getting weird?

6

u/witcherstrife 10d ago

It's just the next logical step for immersion.

28

u/Selik0 10d ago

Meta-universes as a definition was long time before Facebook, as far as I know, it was firstly presented to public with "Ready player one" book

24

u/syed_abubaker15 10d ago

Ready Player One was inspired by a novel (kinda ig) called Snow Crash written by Neal Stephenson. In that book there is a virtual reality world whose name was Metaverse, the reason why people are filled with conspiracies about this coincidence is because in the real world(within the book) the society differentiation between rich and poor had become far too vast(kinda like how it is now) and everyone thought the Metaverse would be a solution to this and people can have a 2nd life where everyone are equal.....buuut that didn't happen the difference came in super quick leaving everyone as miserable as they were both in reality and vr and those who were already rich enjoyed both lives as well.

Note:I've watched some videos on this and am yet to read the book so take everything I said with a pinch of salt

8

u/SpaceCaseSixtyTen 10d ago

I just keep thinking that it is a pretty pretentious word for Facebook to use on its software

2

u/LlamaFullyLaden 10d ago

Plenty of old Tom Clancy novels with persistent VR worlds

2

u/Selik0 10d ago

VR ≠ Metaverse

2

u/TheFlightlessPenguin 10d ago

Neal Stephenson’s book Snow Crash is actually credited with coining the term.

28

u/TasteMyDay 10d ago

Ready Player Two, Pornhub's Rendition.

19

u/TaliFinn 10d ago

My Metapenis?

5

u/api10 10d ago

You mean nanopenis?

2

u/TaliFinn 10d ago

I dont want to touch yours, sorry

15

u/NotEnoughWave 10d ago

High five-ing across the world?

15

u/joc95 10d ago

well considering vrchat has a new texture effect called "Dynamic Penetration" where it recognises when two players touch, im sure it is very very Very possible

2

u/jakewastaken01 10d ago

That name can be taken out of context VERY EASILY

4

u/joc95 10d ago

Oh boy. Let me tell you. It is used alot for THAT context.

2

u/jakewastaken01 10d ago

HELL NO, I'm leaving

3

u/AgileReleaseTrain 10d ago

No no no no, I'm pretty sure that was intentional.

42

u/Hysaky 10d ago

Titties here i come

24

u/Deinonychusfeathers 10d ago

Maybe you and I aren’t so different

4

u/KAYS33K 10d ago

You can count me too.

1

u/Deinonychusfeathers 10d ago

So we became the trio of titty lovers

2

u/Hysaky 10d ago

You are Issei, I'm matsuda and he is motohama

1

u/Deinonychusfeathers 10d ago

Who are those actually I don’t watch anime

1

u/Hysaky 10d ago

Highschool DxD, all the titties of the world are in this anime, the names i say are the Pervert Trio which Issei is one of the members

1

u/Deinonychusfeathers 9d ago

Ok thx for the info

2

u/KAYS33K 10d ago

The holy trinity

8

u/Professional-Gap-747 10d ago

I was not thinking about that before reading that line

7

u/Hiroto_Katsuma 10d ago

I’m gonna say it since no-one is brave enough to...

~Virtual Hand Holding~

5

u/Lysdexiic 10d ago

Now that's just going too far there. Get your mind out of the gutter, pervert

1

u/klopolklopolk 10d ago

Can't you get virtual STDs by holding virtual hands?

7

u/MrElliot1210 10d ago

I can finally know what it's like to hold hands!!!!!!!!!!!

3

u/Malicioussnooper 10d ago

Meta shakeweight

3

u/Darrullo 10d ago

I never thought I'd live to see the day of be robo jacking off, brings a tier to the eye

3

u/nopedotavi69 10d ago

what the fuck is a metaverse

1

u/dense111 10d ago

Facebook VR

3

u/Damop45 10d ago

Ohhhh B2 I know exactly what your thinking and I'm thinking it too

3

u/Organic-label21 10d ago

Can someone explain the context behind this?

3

u/awxggu 10d ago

Wait what are you guys thinking

3

u/Octoev69 10d ago

Me and the boys grabbing balls in vr

3

u/Mrmctrustyguy 10d ago

I know what we're gonna do today Ferb!

296

u/not_rahul 10d ago

Finally digital handshake with my bros.

110

u/XXLAZARBATOR_69XX 10d ago

And maybe a vr brojob

45

u/not_rahul 10d ago

Gotta say No Homo tho

19

u/Slow-Dealer-2109 10d ago

Take this gay go away pills

8

u/not_rahul 10d ago

Unless if you are gay then don't take them.

8

u/Slow-Dealer-2109 10d ago

I use them three times a day even my friend Johnathan Joestar uses it

2

u/jakewastaken01 10d ago

Thanks! kind stranger

4

u/handsomellama28 10d ago

It ain't gay if you do it with the homies

2

u/XXLAZARBATOR_69XX 10d ago

After all its not a blowjob, its a brojob

2

u/XXLAZARBATOR_69XX 10d ago edited 10d ago

Nah bro full homo

1

u/JTE9000 10d ago

Maybe get some neckbeard on the other end to suck on his ultra sonic wand & simulate the real thing

1

u/XXLAZARBATOR_69XX 10d ago

Thats sounds kinda sus bro

1

u/imajpeg 10d ago

Striking Vipers!

3

u/SmugAssPimp 10d ago

Firmhandshakes with the boys 🤝🤝🤝

2

u/jwg529 10d ago

So what if it was a program where you were stroking you own in VR but in reality it was Bob in Arizona getting his willy wacked?

8

u/Deinonychusfeathers 10d ago

Finally I can beat up furries without getting arrested

6

u/BefreiedieTittenzwei 10d ago

Schließlich! Nach all dieser Zeit kann ich die Hand ausstrecken und das Rheinland wieder erobern!

8

u/DefNotAF 10d ago

poopenfarten

2

u/DriedMapleSyrup 10d ago

Hans, starte Panzer Selbstfahrlafette IV Ausf. A

3

u/Tydeus1998 10d ago

Du meinst wohl Polen und Frankreich wieder einnehmen

1

u/Uberzwerg 10d ago

Erweitertes Rheinland

2

u/Alekipayne 10d ago

Now I can pet senko!!!

2

u/kuzinnik0 10d ago

The meta verse from Facebook is going to be a cheap only vr copy of vrchat

2

u/annniiimmmmeeee 10d ago

Yes, we all are thinking what hes thinking.... Touching Shreks big daddy muscles.

2

u/JFSOCC 10d ago

I think so Brain, but wouldn't you need a trampoline engineer for that?

2

u/TicoLyro 10d ago

u/deathray5 holding hands right? He is thinking about holding hands

2

u/deathray5 10d ago

Premarital hand holding. Finally I can reach my dream of being a slut in VR

2

u/slenderender64 10d ago

omfg their trying to be the oasis lol

3

u/Ambitious-Event-8466 10d ago

Now someone can finally jerk off Joe Mama

4

u/CalvinAndHobbes144 10d ago

Yeah, ima finally find out what lava feels like

3

u/NoTelevision2210 10d ago

HUG ALL THE VIRTUAL FURRIES!

1

u/Undertalebro69 10d ago

Tits. We all thought it

1

u/Limes_n_lemons 10d ago

ready player one???

1

u/Unable_Cow6826 10d ago

Now when you say it like that... I know what you thinking

1

u/dogmeet3 10d ago

Cursed dickpic

1

u/petje1995 10d ago

Honk honk.

1

u/virginfatherof2 10d ago

I will go grab a wall

1

u/-HeyWhatAboutMe- 10d ago

What's going to scare me is if he turns this shit into SAO

1

u/probabalyabot 10d ago

Anime titties

1

u/Kariusol 10d ago

BOOBAAA

1

u/Reddebt20 10d ago

Imma touch… oh wait uhh

1

u/wildbeast47 10d ago

Meta Boobs

1

u/ShadowMaster2564 10d ago

Stick my hand in a volcano

1

u/ImportantResponse0 10d ago

I had the same idea when I read this

1

u/Party_Routine4040 10d ago

Guys I think I just found out I can read minds

1

u/ImportantResponse0 10d ago

Extreme pain with no other risk. Imagine puting your hand in lava.

1

u/stitchpull 10d ago

Now that is a cool concept. All those people that have intrusive thoughts could act them out.

1

u/Wolventec 10d ago

anyone remember the feeling boobs from the switch announcment https://youtu.be/NHjaDbHkT6o?t=14

1

u/Waidu4lyfu 10d ago

Anime TITTTESSSS

1

u/mightsdiadem 10d ago

The time to porn on this one is going to be minimal.

1

u/thottestthot 10d ago

i can feel a girlfriend now

1

u/GirthMcMeat 10d ago

Can’t wait for proctologist simulator 2022

1

u/nagachipsdown1 10d ago

now i can finally know what minecraft dirt feels like

1

u/f0xgr 10d ago

Stick your dick in it

1

u/Meet974 10d ago

He's feeling hulk's ball not balls

1

u/ThirdAltAccounts 10d ago

Let the metaverse fappening begin

1

u/Natfhan 10d ago

Boobas

1

u/AlternateSatan 10d ago

Gonna jack off my homies over Facebook

1

u/kaatiil 10d ago

cupAboobie

1

u/Irklord 10d ago

I would have preferred to do it with my android wife but I guess doing it with her AI is just like inserting just the tip. It's not much but its a start.

1

u/SwimmerDJ 10d ago

Ready Player One

1

u/supereuben 10d ago

I can finally touch a tree with this every morning.

1

u/Rusty_fox4 10d ago

I can finally hold the hands of my father who definitely just went out to buy some milk

1

u/carlsaganblessyou 10d ago

Meta’s new haptic glove let us you feel things

1

u/Testing1234Test1234 10d ago

You are a wizard Harry.

This is a good one Harry

1

u/hknewt 10d ago

That's the closest someone is going to get to sex

1

u/Betacanismajoris 10d ago

Y'll know that probally 99,9% who will use this stuff will be yiffers and lolis, right?

1

u/JasonBH2713 10d ago

Robotic wank glove? Feel the meta penis lol

1

u/TheLastDrops 10d ago

Yep, I'm thinking "Why did they put an apostrophe in 'lets'?"

1

u/HugeProposal 10d ago

Yes, but I want one for my face too.

1

u/c0ch153 10d ago

Danger Will Robinson

1

u/LordNilix 10d ago

Huh, so the VR Jedi Temple raid will be far more fun

1

u/Few_short_cucumbers 10d ago

That this is the first step to fully enslaving us in the Matrix?

1

u/FacePunchThor 10d ago

Virtual hand holding!

1

u/dont_tread_on_bees 10d ago

Wow i now have a new business idea: anonymous VR brojobs. You can make it look however you want on your end but it's recieved anonymously

1

u/CoffeePizzaSushiDick 10d ago

“Don’t forget to cup the balls”.
-Mom <3

1

u/purplebeansoup 10d ago

All comments saying boobs.. I went straight for the snatch. Now i feel dirty

1

u/CarlosFer2201 10d ago

Of course! VR bunnies and puppies.

1

u/PowerfulWoodpecker72 10d ago

we need to get chaturbate and that guy who invented the hologram box and this glove all into one amalgamation of fuckery.

1

u/DRV721 10d ago

Spurs: Trophy

1

u/Jha1areso1v 10d ago

This is probably the first time I see this meme. I am so confused.

1

u/popeye_1616 10d ago

zuccing and fucking

1

u/ilikeitsharp 10d ago

We all this was coming long ago.

1

u/CloudYdaY_ 10d ago

tbh i hope I am long dead when this becomes what zuck wants it to be

1

u/escalopes 10d ago

I can finally pet a dinosaur

1

u/Jackal_Oddie 10d ago

Finally, I can see what Lava feels like